If your pastor’s name is Mark Smith, you would address your envelope “The Reverend Mark Smith. ” Gender does not matter. The title is the same. Jill Poe would be “The Reverend Jill Poe. ” If both people in the couple are pastors and share a last name, you address them both as “The Reverends” and then the last name. So pastors Joe and Sally Carr would be “The Reverends Carr. ”[2] X Research source

If your pastor Mark Smith has a Ph. D, you would address the formal envelope “The Reverend Dr. Mark Smith” or “The Reverend Mark Smith, Ph. D. ” Both are equally acceptable.

For a male pastor with a wife, you would write, “The Reverend and Mrs. Mark Smith. ” If they don’t share a last name, you would write, “The Reverend Mark Smith and Ms. Molly Doe. ”[5] X Research source For a female pastor with a husband, you would write, “The Reverend Zoe Deen and Mr. John Deen. ” If they don’t share a last name, you would write, “The Reverend Zoe Deen and Mr. John Canton. [6] X Research source If the pastor’s spouse has another title that is more appropriate than Mr. , Mrs. , or Ms. you should use that title, instead. This might be the case when the spouse has a doctorate. For example, for a pastor with a spouse who is a doctor, you would write, “The Reverend Jim Price and Dr. Samantha Price” or “The Reverend Maxine Su and Dr. James Su. ”

A male pastor and his wife in such a church would be addressed, “The Reverend Ronnie Franklin and First Lady Linda Franklin. ”

For example, you would address a pastor and his wife who is a colonel as follows, “Colonel Jane Wilton, US Army and The Reverend Max Wilton. ”

If you were writing a casual thank you note, you might begin, “Pastor Molly Mitchell. ”

If writing an email, you might start, “Reverend John Smith. ” There are fewer rules regarding very casual correspondence. If you know the priest well, it may make sense to use the more casual address “Father. ” So for example, “Father John Smith. ”[11] X Research source Marriage is uncommon in the Catholic Church. If you’re in doubt as to the faith leader’s denomination, but know they are married, assume they are Protestant. [12] X Research source

For example, you could address Reverend Max Dunt as “Rev. Dunt. ” Similarly, you could address Pastor Lindy Reese “Pr. Reese. ”

For example, you would address a Protestant pastor and his wife of the same last name as “Pastor Mike Huff and Mrs. Rita Huff. ” If Mrs. Huff were a doctor, you would address them as “Pastor Mike Huff and Dr. Rita Huff. ” If the congregation were one that uses the “First Lady” terminology, you might address them as “Pastor Mike Huff and First Lady Rita Huff. ”

For example, you could call a pastor named Jill Shannon “Pastor Shannon. ” Some congregations are more familial and casual than others. If this seems like it applies to your situation, you might try calling your pastor “Pastor” and their first name (For example, “Pastor Jill”) or even simply “Pastor. ” You can ask your pastor what they like best.

For example, you would address a priest named Don Everton as “Father Everton. ” Some parishes like to keep things very casual, in which case the priest may simply go by “Father” and his first name (for example, “Father Don”) or even simply “Father. ” You can ask your priest what he prefers to be called to avoid any confusion.

For example, you might call a pastor’s husband, “Dr. Johnson,” if he is a dentist. Similarly, you might call a pastor’s wife who does not share his last name, “Ms. Wells. ” If the congregation is one that uses the term “First Lady” outlined in part one, use the title with only her last name. Pastor Michael Jones’s wife Donna would be addressed, “First Lady Jones. ”