For instance, you could say something like, “I’d rather not talk about that,” or, “It’s a long story, but now isn’t the time to tell it. ” If you’re not comfortable discussing your scars, consider covering them up to avoid questions. Be aware that refusing to discuss your scars may make people even more curious about them.
Keep in mind that most people are not knowledgeable about self-harming behavior and do not understand it, so they might respond in unhelpful ways. For example, they might try to force you to change, accuse you of doing it for attention, focus only on your injuries and scars, or refuse to acknowledge or discuss it with you. Prepare yourself for these types of reactions before you decide to share with someone. You can say something simple and to-the-point like, “I cut myself when I was depressed several years ago, but I’m doing better now. ” Then change the subject.
For instance, don’t talk about which tool you used to cut yourself. Instead, say something like, “I felt really isolated and lonely back then, and this is how I dealt with it. ”
For instance, it’s generally okay to explain to a six-year-old what scars are. Since young children don’t understand complex issues like self-harm, though, don’t talk about hurting yourself. Instead, say you got the scars when you were sick. However, for older adolescents or teens, you might give a bit more detail that like “I was really sad for a while and this is how I dealt with it. It wasn’t the right decision, but I’m glad I’ve moved past it. "
This only works if your scars look like they could have been caused by an accident. For instance, if you have rows of scars that were clearly caused by self-harm, people probably won’t believe your story that your cat scratched you.
This approach is especially effective with children and teenagers, since it helps them relate to you.
Say something that obviously isn’t true, such as, “I fought a dragon when I was a kid. ” Laugh it off and change the subject as soon as possible. Of course, self-harm isn’t something to make light of, but this may be your only route to take if you’d rather not disclose personal info to a person or group. [7] X Research source
If you are a woman, you may be able to stay cooler in the summer by wearing long skirts, sheer tights, and light cardigans. For one-time events when you cannot cover up with clothes, consider using a professional concealer. You can get this from a dermatologist. Another option is to cover your arm with a light shawl.
If you choose to use makeup, look for a heavy-duty concealer that’s designed to cover tattoos or scars. Many regular foundations don’t provide adequate coverage. Do not put makeup on a scar until it is fully healed.
