When you need to interact even though you don’t really feel like doing so, organize your thoughts so you can keep the interaction as brief and basic as possible. If you’re not comfortable sitting in the middle of the crowd in school, look for a spot in the back of the room or another more isolated spot. Join the crowd when you want to.
Pause and think before speaking. Consider whether a comment is really necessary. It is surprising how often being quiet is the best response.
Other people may see you as fascinatingly mysterious if you don’t share your feelings and opinions widely.
Limit the amount of eye contact you make. Instead, look down at your feet or stare off into space.
Being “very cold and quiet” doesn’t mean you have a free pass to treat other people like trash. You deserve to be able to be left alone, but other people deserve to be treated by you with basic dignity and respect.
Sometimes, you just really need to say something like the following: “I’m sorry, but no, I can’t help you today. I really need some “me time” this afternoon. ” You have no right to harm others through your actions or inaction, but you also shouldn’t feel guilty about prioritizing your own wants when possible.
Being yourself is more important than basing your actions on the opinions of others, but that doesn’t mean you’re free to be rude or spiteful. Don’t respond at all instead of being intentionally rude in your response. Others may still interpret your lack of response as rude, but that’s out of your control.
For instance, focus first only on your own wants as you come to the realization that you want to quit your job and find something better suited to your personality. Only after you’ve identified this want should you consider how it might impact others around you.
Journaling, writing creatively, and producing artwork are also activities that are often well-suited to introverts. However, don’t feel obligated to do only these things because you’re an introvert. If you want to go play football or ice skate, do it!
Instead of wishing you were different, take the time to really learn about yourself. Identify and celebrate the positives about “you being you,” and identify paths toward self-improvement when appropriate. Be self-centered. You are your own main focus. Cold people don’t have an easy time talking to other people, much less seeing life from someone else’s way. Be neither curious nor interested in other people.
Don’t ignore your shortcomings, but also don’t berate yourself for having shortcomings. Identify them, learn from them, and strive to make improvements, but don’t try to completely change who you are.
Talk to your primary care doctor for referrals to mental health professionals. A good therapist won’t try to change who you are. Instead, they’ll use various techniques to help you bring out a healthier version of yourself.
