Social situations with your friends should feel relaxed and comfortable. You may speak and act less formally if you’re with your friends. During work events, you should be more attentive to social mores. While you may be friendly with your co-workers and your boss, it’s not the same as being around your friends. [2] X Research source Being around family members also means you act differently. You may not talk or act the same around your family as you do around your friends. Make sure to be especially attentive to the situation when you’re meeting new people. You want to be on your best behavior and manners when introducing yourself to new acquaintances.
Realize the expectations in terms of meals. If the party is during a meal, it’s likely that a meal will be served rather than finger food. Know the expectations of what you should bring. Social occasions around dinner time may require you to bring a bottle of wine. Contact your host if you’re not sure. Don’t overindulge on food or drink. This is especially true for social occasions during the day. You don’t want to look foolish in front of others. [4] X Research source
Know where the event is taking place. If it’s in a church, like a baptism or a wedding, then make sure to dress appropriately. Time of day also tells you how formal the occasion may be. In general, the later the occasion, the more formal it becomes. Pay attention to invitations. If there are a number of invitations that are relatively formal, then know that the event is probably formal as well.
Use your sense of humor. However, limit off-color jokes or statements. Don’t joke about things that may offend strangers or acquaintances. [6] X Research source Have good manners. Poor manners can make people uncomfortable, especially when eating and drinking. Be considerate of others. Hold open doors for others and pull out their chairs. Don’t make them uncomfortable, but let them know you are trying to make them feel welcome. [7] X Research source Come with a gift if appropriate. When you are visiting someone’s home, come with a gift. It can be small, but you want to have something you can present to your host or hostess to show your appreciation for being invited. [8] X Research source
Know who others are and how they may feel. Try to remember each person you meet and how and why they are there. This will tell you something about their own comfort level. Realize that uncomfortable situations are nobody’s fault; they are just a fact of life. Think of things from their perspective if you’re in an uncomfortable situation. Pay attention how much eye contact others are giving you. This may tell you how comfortable they feel and how much they are engaged. Look at other’s body language. See if their arms and body is closed, or crossed, or open and available. [10] X Research source
Try taking a breath or counting to three to yourself before responding to someone. Give yourself a minute before you speak. Clear your head to avoid saying something regrettable. You don’t want to create an uncomfortable situation. Avoid controversial topics. Don’t talk about things like politics or religion. Those subjects are based saved for close family and friends. [13] X Research source
Try to share truthful things about yourself. This will show that you are not only concerned with making you look good. Use self-deprecating humor. Making fun of yourself can be a good way to make sure others will not. [16] X Research source Don’t put yourself down too much. Otherwise, you seem like you are not confident.
Talk about things that make you proud. You can share things about work, school, or your life that you feel good about. Contribute to the conversation. Don’t start talking about something that does not relate. Instead, let your contributions flow naturally in the conversation. [17] X Research source Make an effort to talk to others. People like others who share and talk to them.
Talk to people you know at parties. This can be a good way to meet others that they may know. Try not to gossip with friends. This will alienate other people from you. [18] X Research source Make sure to not talk exclusively to people you know. Otherwise, you’ll never meet new people.
Gauge how to dress appropriately. Keep in mind what type of social situation you’re going to and dress accordingly. Use common sense. Don’t wear anything strange or out of place. You want to look your best, not draw unnecessary attention to yourself. If you end up overdressed or underdressed, make sure that you still look good. Being confident in your dress may make you look appropriately dressed.
Make eye contact with everyone. Eye contact makes you seem more confident and comfortable around others. Speak in a clear and steady voice. Don’t try to talk too fast or let your nerves show through. Have good body language and posture. Stand up straight and don’t slouch. Try not to cross your arms or legs so you have an open and welcoming posture. Feel good about yourself. You have a lot to offer others and they should want to talk to you.
Try not to be too nervous. Nothing’s too serious about any social environment that you can’t have fun. Laugh and joke around with others. Everyone enjoys a little levity. Don’t try to be a clown for others. Forcing too much fun can create an uncomfortable situation.
Feel good about talking and interacting with others. Even if some interactions don’t go well, just keep in mind that you tried. Know that you may not make friends. Some social occasions may be the only time you meet someone. Have a good time with them then and don’t worry about the future. Realize that uncomfortable situations may arise. Deal with them as they come and you’ll find they are easier to deal with than you imagine. Get out of the conversation if you need to. If the person you are talking to is offensive or acting strangely, politely excuse yourself. There’s no reason you have to talk to people that make you feel uncomfortable.
Talk to people who are standing by themselves. If they look friendly and open, come up to them and start a conversation. Ask people about themselves. Don’t pry too much, but general information can be a good starting place for a conversation. Avoid negative thoughts. Try not to think of the worse case scenario. Nothing that bad can happen if you try to talk to a stranger at a social event.
Wear clothes that makes you look and feel good. Highlight what’s best about you. [21] X Research source Discuss topics you feel comfortable with. Don’t direct the conversation, but highlight things you know about and can contribute to in conversation. Don’t force your best qualities on others. Only sing, or perform other talents, if people ask you to. Unprompted performances can be awkward and unwanted.
