Be open and honest with yourself. Evaluate elements of your life such as your job, family situations, relationships with others, and your physical health. Make a list of things that sap you of your joy and then ask, “What can I do to change this?” Then write an answer such as, “I’d be more joyful if I didn’t let my wife’s judgmental mother affect my mood. ”
Let your doctor know about what you’re feeling. Be as honest as possible. Remember that your doctor is there to help you and you have nothing about which to be ashamed. Ask questions about what treatment your doctor suggests to find joy again in your life. She may suggest visiting a psychiatrist or other mental health professional to undergo psychotherapy. Your may also get a prescription for an anti-depressant, which can increase serotonin, the hormone that contributes to happiness, in your brain.
Remove a person from your life completely if he is a considerable drain on your joy. You can do so with kindness by saying something to the person such as, “I value you, but I need a bit of a break. ” You can choose how much detail you provide. Choose to limit your exposure to the person if you can’t remove him entirely. You can easily do this by saying some like, “Thank you very much for the kind invitation but I unfortunately can’t make it. ” Counteract negative attitudes, comments, and viewpoints by reminding the person of the positive side of what he said. This could help you feel a little joy and may even cause the person to move on from you. Remember that challenging experiences and emotions are an important part of life, and that even destructive relationships may ultimately help you learn and grow after they’ve been ended. [5] X Expert Source Michael SternLife Coach Expert Interview. 1 July 2020.
Avoid embracing any anger and/or rage you may feel. Find a way to get through situations that cause these emotions constructively so that they don’t become chronic. Surround yourself with supportive individuals. Sharing what you’re experiencing can cue them into finding ways to make you joyful and happy. Even reaching out on social media may help since the people you love often want nothing but your happiness. Feel compassion and kindness towards other people and beings such as animals and plants. Doing something nice for others can bring you—and the person or being—joy and happiness. [6] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
Write out a list of anything that makes you joyful. It doesn’t have to be anything detailed or fancy. Simple things, such as “my family and I have a comfortable home and plenty to eat,” are excellent. You can also put fancier things, too. Something like a great dinner, massage, or your team winning the playoffs are things that might also bring you joy. Keep your list in a handy place like your handbag or wallet. This ensures that you can pull it out at any time, especially if you need a ray of sunshine in your day.
Wake up to soothing sounds instead of a jarring alarm. [9] X Research source Consider things like birds chirping or waves lapping up on the shore. Then repeat positive words to yourself such as, “Today is going to be a brilliant day,” and, “I will have a really productive day. ” Establish some type of morning ritual so that you can leave your home with as little stress as possible. Your morning ritual could include things like having breakfast with your loved ones, taking a shower, or doing some gentle yoga. Remember that eating a healthy breakfast can give you the energy and nutrients to get through your day. It also can keep you happy by preventing slumps in blood sugar. Try a slice of whole wheat toast with some jam, a cup of Greek yogurt with fresh berries, and a cup of coffee or tea.
Get at least 75 minutes of vigorous activity or 150 minutes of moderate activity each week. Do exercises and activities that that you enjoy. Things like walking, hiking, running, yoga, swimming, or biking are a few example of what you can do. You can also do activities like jumping on a trampoline or with a rope. Even taking your dog outside to play works. [11] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source
Step away from any situation that causes you stress if you are able. A five or 10 minute break may do wonders for anyone involved. Use the time to take a short walk or something else you enjoy. Try deep breathing for a few breaths for squeeze a rubbery stress ball if you cannot leave a situation that causes you stress. Pull out your list of things that make you joyful to help diffuse your stress. One way to incorporate mindfulness into your daily routine is to have an alarm go off at regular intervals to remind you to notice your breath and feel your feet on the ground. [14] X Expert Source Michael SternLife Coach Expert Interview. 1 July 2020.
Check you list of things that bring you joy and figure out where you can fit them in your schedule. This may require actively carving out time in your day, even if it is only for 10 minutes, to do some yoga poses or grab a cup of coffee and read the paper. Make sure to devote ample time to thing you love on days you have no responsibilities or commitments. The relaxation and joy from that day can easily carry over into days where you are feeling blue or stressed.
Try out something you’ve always wanted to do. It could be something like skydiving, doing ballet, kayaking, or creating pottery. Give yourself a few weeks to see if you really love it and if it brings you joy. If you find out it isn’t what you thought, you can always try out something else. Use your new hobby to meet new people, who may also help you be joyful.
Use your me time to do things you love that bring you joy. This can be as simple as reading a book or even enjoying some solitary running or kayaking in the woods. Tell someone who asks to go along that you would like to go alone that day. Be nice about it by saying something like, “I’d love for you to go with me, Anna, but I’ve had a really stressful week and need to decompress by myself a bit. I’d be happy to go with you another time, though. ” Pamper yourself during your me time. Remember that your me time is meant to bring you joy, including by reducing your stress. You can pamper yourself in a variety of ways such as getting a massage or letting someone fill your gas at the station. Self-care may seem cliche, but it really is essential to protect the time and space to keep yourself energized, otherwise you risk burning out. [18] X Expert Source Michael SternLife Coach Expert Interview. 1 July 2020.
Avoid treating yourself too often. Treating yourself too frequently makes it less of a “treat” and can also cause financial problems. Consider allowing yourself small treats on a daily basis if you need the pick me up. This could be something such as having a mini candy bar or taking the elevator instead of the stairs.
Do activities that you and your family and friends enjoy. This could be going to happy hour or dinner, talking a walk or vacation together, or even just talking on the phone for a few minutes. Be aware that it is more important to spend more time with your loved ones than it is to have “me” time. This allows you to connect to them and experience joy in different ways than simply finding it on your own.
Find a clever way to contact the person. With social media, it’s often very easy. For example, you could send an old photo of yourself with the person and say, “Remember this? I’ve been thinking about you a lot. ” Don’t discount simply calling the person, either. Avoid forcing the friendship. Friendships are never something that should leave you running after another person. You may also find that you need to have a new type of friendship with the person because people do change over time.
Start off any interaction with a smile. It doesn’t even need to be a big, toothy grin. A smile to a person you walk past may get a smile in return. Generally, the nicer you are to others, the more they will want you around and you’ll experience the positive social consequences. Make eye contact whenever you can. Consider greeting others with a cheerful “hello. ” Remember to say “please” and “thank you. ” Saying these things and incorporating positive behaviors become a habit over time. Even at tough times, they can offer a glimmer of humanity to other people who are struggling.
Keep in mind that you don’t have to do something grand. Buying coffee for a friend or colleague who is having a hard time or giving someone a kind word can help the other person—and you—be joyful. [23] X Research source
Offer your time to a health facility or organization that provides aid to those less fortunate than you. Consider working at a place where your skills may be especially welcome. For example, if you like to paint, you could volunteer to paint with sick children or the elderly. You could also help individuals living in shelters develop their job skills.