Make a commitment out loud to yourself to grow. Try saying, “I will accept this challenge to change, to learn, and to grow by developing my ability to think rationally. ” Determine if you are operating from your “rational mind” or your “emotional mind. ” In rational mind your thinking is focused and more logical, utilizing past experience, facts, and research to help you plan and make decisions. In emotional mind your thinking is reactive, sometimes illogical, and uses emotions to plan and make decisions.
Consider the cognitive biases that are possible for you to have such as availability heuristic, bandwagon effect, or confirmation bias. Think objectively about what biases you may exhibit or experience. Confront that bias and change it by consciously taking a step back and re-evaluating those assumptions.
Keep an “intellectual” journal. Keep a journal separate from others you may have, and in it, describe situations that have occurred. Record your analysis by evaluating the situation, what happened in detail including what you thought and how you reacted. Write about what you learned about yourself, what could have gone differently, and how rational you reacted. If you encounter a complex problem and are feeling overwhelmed, pause and break the elements of the problem down. [5] X Trustworthy Source Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development Nonprofit organization providing innovative, effective educational resources for educators designed to support student achievement Go to source Think through each element, figuring out and writing down your purpose in addressing that element, the question you are trying to answer, and what information you need to approach the problem rationally. When you notice you are feeling a strong or negative emotion, again pause and analyze. [6] X Expert Source Christina Stathopoulos, PCC, ACCCCertified Leadership & Life Coach Expert Interview. 15 October 2021. Ask yourself what the thought is that is leading to the emotional reaction and how that might be flawed. Ask yourself what you are basing your thought on that is leading to the emotional reaction. Evaluate that information for reliability. If you struggle with responding to situations rationally, it’s extremely important to identify the reason behind that. Usually, it means that you’re tired and need a break before making a decision. Or, it could mean that a value of yours is being stepped on or a need of yours isn’t being met. [7] X Expert Source Christina Stathopoulos, PCC, ACCCCertified Leadership & Life Coach Expert Interview. 15 October 2021.
At the start, you should be practicing your rational thinking skills multiple times a day. As you progress further, your rational thinking will become easier and more natural, taking less conscious effort and time.
Have an explanation or evidence behind your opinions. It is important that you base your opinions on something. Know where your opinions come from and how to discuss them with others. [11] X Expert Source Christina Stathopoulos, PCC, ACCCCertified Leadership & Life Coach Expert Interview. 15 October 2021. Be critical about evidence or information that sparks beliefs or opinions. Be open to changing your opinion if new evidence or arguments are presented.
Be prepared to articulate, explain, and defend your thoughts on an issue. “I disagree. Here’s why. ” Admit that someone else has made a good point, even if it is counter to yours. “That’s a great point. I had not considered it that way before. ” Be willing to listen to and accept counter-arguments if they are well reasoned. “I’m interested in your viewpoint. How did you come to that conclusion?”
Start by taking two deep breaths and refocusing your thinking. Be strategic about what you complain about. Only complain if it is in order to help you find a resolution. Try to make time goals for yourself, such as going 24 hours without complaining
Make eye contact with your friend and observe their emotional expressions. Avoid any distractions such as your phone in order to fully focus on them. Clarify and restate things to make sure you are understanding your friend correctly. Identify the difference between rational information and emotional information that your friend is giving you.
Step away from your current view of the world and imagine what it might be like for them. [15] X Research source Recognize that your best bet to reasoning with them, or providing them with a rational perspective is to understand their experience and their assumptions. [16] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source Acknowledge that an emotion is an emotion. If something affects someone, it is no less important. Empathy is crucial in relationships.
Be careful, though. Friends might not always come to you for advice or for a rational perspective. [17] X Research source Sometimes friends just need to vent and share their experience or their emotion with you. Be cautious against providing constant, unsolicited advice.
